Why I'm back, I have no idea....

I had a feeling I would be coming back. I didn't know how long of a break I was going to take, but deep down in my heart I knew I would be back to blogging. I think I just needed a break from all the crap. In many ways the last year or so has been rough, mixed with so many incredible things as well. But it had gotten to the point where I felt like I couldn't express what was on my mind freely. My blog had always been a place where I could bitch, complain, vent, share, ask for help. I couldn't do any of that anymore. I felt that too many people in my life read my blog or could stumble across it and might not like what I had to say. I felt censored.

I don't have those feelings anymore. At all, so beware. So many of those people are out of my life now. If they were to stumble across the blog and read it, I really wouldn't care.

The past year and a half has been an amazing year. I'm in a relationship that truly makes me happy, where I feel like I'm an equal. I have someone who's in my life on a daily basis and who truly loves me and I him. We have so many things in common, including Art and our obsession with all things Disney. I mean, there's a reason for spending the rest of your life with someone if I ever heard of one.

I'm not discounting my previous relationship. It was a wonderful 4 years. I wouldn't trade it for anything. He provided some wonderful times and experiences that I'll never forget. We were just two very different people who wanted different things. We both made mistakes, myself more so. In the end, it worked out the best for both parties. I would have loved for us to have stayed close, but his friends and current lover prevent that from happening. Childishness, drama and backstabbing are things that I do not deal with and will avoid at all cost. Life's too short to deal with all that shit.

My social life has changed drastically. I was a social butterfly, with tons of friends, going out and doing things constantly. Now, we're homebodies and how quickly people drop you to the wayside when that happens. It's not like we don't like to go out, enjoy dinners, drinks or movies with friends. We do. Luckily, we still have our best friend couple, Brandon and Dusty with whom we love dearly. We don't see one another as much as we both would like, but we try at least and do get to see one another once in a while. Hopefully, that will continue to grow.

Other friends in our life such as the ones we made through The Ranch are pretty much gone. We don't keep in contact. Hell, the last time we were there it was as if we were total strangers. That part of our life is gone and we're ok with that. It's in the past and I have a feeling that we probably will never go back. What would be the reason? Even many of the friends I had from my previous relationship that we hung out with here in town have disappeared as well. Moved on. I guess I would say that true friends are the ones that have stuck around. True friends are the ones you see and hear from and the ones who want to spend time with you. There are very few now. How can you go from tons of friends down to ones you can count on one hand?

This past year has been an eyeopener regarding all of that. At times we feel like outcasts. At the age of 43, there are times where it feels like Highschool all over again. I'll admit, it hurts. Nothing is worse then sitting at home, hearing and reading about friends out having a good time.

I guess it's time to move on from them and start to cultivate new friendships. Kind of what starting this blog up again is about.

I missed it, missed my blog friends.

I'm back everyone.